JANINA'S BLOG POST: REFLECTING ON SIGI'S DAY
July 30th was a day that I was looking forward to and dreading all at once. It was the day that we celebrated the life of my mother, my best friend, my companion of 40 years, my business partner, my other half. She meant so much to so many: she was a world-class breeder, a confidant, a mother, a grandmother, a travel companion. She was fun, passionate, smart, intuitive, strong yet soft, compassionate, resilient, empathetic, and loved life more than anyone I’ve ever met. She was, in short, one of the most amazing people I’ve ever met! I know these are strong words coming from her daughter, but I know I’m not the only one who felt this way from the hundreds of cards, letters, e-mails, phone calls and messages I’ve received over the last few months. People who knew her well had a deep connection. And people who only met her briefly did too. That was her beauty and her gift – she simply made people feel special.
We wanted her Celebration of Life to truly reflect those qualities she imparted. So we formed a celebration committee andmet every Tuesday for nearly 3 months to plan her big bash. It was a cathartic experience gathering with family and friends each week. We ate good food, drank a lot, and – to keep us on track – followed my brother’s strict agenda. (That was a big job!) We laughed and cried a lot, but I went to bed each of those nights with my mom’s love wrapped around my heart, and I know the others did too.
When the big day arrived, we were very prepared for the 400+ people who attended to celebrate “a life well lived.” Each element of the day held special meaning. The band we used was comprised of a group of now-grown“boys” Sigi practically raised. They were nearly all childhood friends of my brother’s, and were the perfect entertainers for the night. Another dear friend of ours, a professional opera singer who has an angelic voice, honored my mom with two beautiful songs that my mom loved… one of them was sung at her last birthday party, and had my mom in tears of joy. Family and loved ones spoke; the food and drinks were plentiful; and the atmosphere was positive and celebratory.
We also wanted to give back to the cancer community. So we created a special estate wine from our Cabernet Sauvignon vineyard that we appropriately entitled “Matriarch.” The label is of my mom wearing the vintage Om El Arab t-shirt. I love this photo of her with her Mona Lisa smile. We recreated the t-shirt as well, and sold them along with the wine with the proceeds going to an alternative cancer research organization called Healing Strong, which is a cancer resource organization that educates, connects, and encourages those seeking comprehensive, natural strategies to heal strong and stay strong.
Darryl Larson’s incredible slide show played every 30 minutes in the indoor arena-turned-cinema, where guests lounged on haybale couches with tissue boxes close at hand. The video is so beautiful. Every time I watch it, I have the biggest smile on my face… and tears too.
My mom was a very spiritual person, and we wanted to bring that element to the day as well. Good friend Carole Colone generated the beautiful idea that every guest bring a rock. People had the opportunity to write in a leather-bound book why they chose their rock for her. It was perfect. So popular was the idea that we were receiving dozens of rocks in the mail from friends who were unable to attend but still wanted to participate! It It was very touching to see all the different rocks people brought that day. They are with her now, as each one has been loving hand-placed alongside her special spot, overlooking the farm, where we planted an oak tree and they will remain forever. I love looking at them and knowing that each rock was picked out especially for Sigi, and is a representation of the giver’s love.
Sigi was unquestionably present that day. I have always felt her in the wind. It caresses me at times and gives me a feeling that she is wrapping herself around me. Doug Dahmen gave a beautiful speech that afternoon. It was hot – that kind of “hot” that is very still and heavy. But as soon as he finished, the wind picked up for a few seconds and little flurries danced around happily. I know that it was her applause.
My mom loved a good party. She was always the last to leave any gathering. That night, a few of us did her proud. We basked in the love we felt for each other and for her, and stayed up until the wee hours of the morning honoring a very special woman.
It was a grand day… I felt full and satisfied knowing that every single element, every detail, every corner of that farm reflected the qualities of Sigi. She was such a force of life that the exercise of celebrating the qualities of her life – loving others, recognizing spirituality, living courageously, following dreams, never giving up, always choosing joy, always choosing humility, identifying what true success really means – in turn, ended up challenging and inspiring every guest who attended to examine his/her own life. Am I living life to the fullest? Am I choosing joy? Am I loving others like I should? Am I living by fear or courage? Can I really follow my dreams? Yes. Yes. Yes. Because Sigi showed us how.
In doing so, Sigi gave each person a priceless gift on July 30th. And that, my friends, is the exemplification of what it means to live a life well lived. There is nothing greater.
We worked hard to make it a perfect day for Sigi. But in the end, Sigi was the one who made it perfect.
As she always did.
